


A Vague Disclaimer is Nobody's Friend

by Telaryn



Category: Leverage
Genre: Bar Room Brawl, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, F/M, Friendship, Girls' Night Out, Relationship Discussions, Shovel Talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-31
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-09-13 16:50:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9132883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Telaryn/pseuds/Telaryn
Summary: While Peggy and Parker go out for drinks, Eliot takes Quinn for "the shovel talk".





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BurningTea](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BurningTea/gifts).



> It's so cool to see new pairings emerge in the fandom! I hope I did this one justice for you, BurningTea. Thank you so much for playing with us this year - hope you had fun!

As dinner invitations went, it wasn’t the strangest one Quinn had ever fielded. Okay, except for the fact that Eliot was using the words “vegan”, “haute cuisine” and “want” in the same sentence, but whatever. “I’m never going to get Parker or Hardison within five hundred yards of the place,” Eliot had said, “and I hate dining alone.”

Quinn knew that “weird food nights” (Parker’s words) had been a thing between Eliot, Nate and Sophie when the latter two had been a more regular part of the Leverage family life, and at first he assumed Eliot was trying to fill whatever social hole had been created by their departure from Portland. Peggy had been disappointed to learn that the invitation was only for him, but had been quickly mollified by Eliot promising a “professional” field trip to the restaurant. “Just the two of us.”

She’d barely suppressed a squeal of delight, giving each of them a hug in turn. When she pressed against him, Quinn found himself remembering how she’d felt in his arms that night their “pretend” relationship had first crossed the line to something very real.

“Parker and Hardison won’t keep her up too late, will they?” he asked two weeks later as they rode in Eliot’s Charger to the restaurant. “She’s got to start buying tomorrow for a tasting.”

He wasn’t stupid. Even as he asked the question, Quinn was bracing himself for all the teasing he would have been giving Eliot had their positions been reversed. The other hitter was silent though, the growl of his car’s engine filling the space between them. _Well, this isn’t good,_ Quinn thought, studying his friend. Whatever was going on here, it was clear now that it was more than scratching some sort of social itch.

“Parker wants me to have the shovel talk with you,” Eliot said abruptly.

Of all the things he could have said, Quinn genuinely hadn’t expected _that._ “As in, ‘a vague disclaimer is nobody’s friend’ shovel talk?” Off Eliot’s startled look, Quinn rolled his eyes. “Please. It’s Buffy – of course I’ve seen it. Favorite season 2, favorite episode Inca Mummy girl, Spuffy blows. Why does Parker want you to threaten me over Peggy? You guys were the ones that started this whole thing by setting us up on that blind date!”

He hadn’t thought it was possible, but Eliot looked even more uncomfortable than before. “I don’t want to know the details man, but I think it has something to do with Thanksgiving and you guys doing it up against a closet wall?”  
**********************************  
Peggy was pretty sure all the blood had drained from her face. “Oh God, Parker, you didn’t!” They’d gone for drinks and dinner at Parker’s suggestion at a restaurant on the other end of town from Eliot and Quinn. _They_ had been generous enough to invite Hardison, but apparently the most recent update to Overwatch had just hit the dark web, and he was down a pretty serious rabbit hole.

The thief didn’t seem to realize she’d done anything wrong. “I sure did!” she declared, downing half of her screwdriver in one swallow. “Quinn needs to understand what’s at stake if he doesn’t treat you like a princess.”

 _She means well…she means well…_ Peggy repeated the phrase over and over to herself, but still felt like a few gears in her brain weren’t engaging as a result of Parker’s overly enthusiastic revelation. She drained her own drink and signaled the bartender for a refill. “Let me get this straight,” she said, holding up a finger to forestall Parker hitting her with any additional heart-stopping revelations. “You were okay with Quinn dating me even though he’s a hired killer…”

“Retrieval specialist,” Parker countered, but she fell silent again immediately at Peggy’s glare.

“What-ever. You were okay with me dating him, but now that we’re having sex you have a problem with it?” Her hands were fairly itching to grab her phone and fire off a warning text to Quinn, but realistically she had to acknowledge that it was probably too late.

She sensed that Parker was starting to realize she’d crossed a line, even though she still couldn’t see the line for herself. “The problem isn’t you guys having sex – it’s that you said you guys were having real feelings for each other now that you’ve started having sex.” Which wasn’t precisely the way Peggy had intended to say it, but she’d already had way too much alcohol to risk getting distracted trying to explain herself any further.

“If you have real feelings he can hurt you, and as your friend it’s my job to make sure that hurting you comes with consequences…right?” _This is what you signed up for when you decided that you liked Alice White enough to pursue a friendship,_ Peggy reminded herself as she watched Parker growing more uncertain about what she had done. Her own mortified feelings would have to be suppressed in favor of the fact that Parker had actually put herself out – knowingly risked embarrassment – for Peggy’s safety and well-being.

The bartender set down another drink in front of her, but Peggy forced herself to leave it where it was for another moment. “Being hurt is part of being in a relationship, Parker. I really appreciate what you’re trying to do here, but you can’t have Eliot beat Quinn up every time he might hurt me.”

“But I can,” Parker insisted, brightening. “That’s why he’s the one setting the ground rules – Quinn wouldn’t be as scared of me.”

 _Now_ Peggy reached for her drink, deciding she definitely wasn’t as buzzed as she needed to be to explain to Parker how very wrong she was.  
*******************************************  
Relief flooded through Parker as she signaled one of the servers for some loaded potato skins. Peggy was already into her second Cosmopolitan, and Eliot and Sophie had made sure the first time Parker and Peggy went out for drinks that she understood the relationship between food and alcohol. She wasn’t supposed to stop Peggy from drinking, but if her friend wasn’t taking the proper precautions against getting sick…

Being friends with people was a lot of work, but Parker was definitely starting to understand why so many people bothered with it. It was nice spending time with somebody who wasn’t part of the family, and who had interests outside of stealing, grifting, and righting the world’s wrongs.

“Quinn won’t tell me when his birthday is,” Peggy said, picking up another potato skin. “Do you think Hardison would look into it?”

Parker was pretty sure Hardison would be willing to look further into Quinn’s background – assuming he hadn’t done so already – but feeling possessive of her relationship with Peggy she said, “Or I could just steal his wallet for you and we could check his license?”

Peggy snorted. “Already tried that. He has three – each of them with a different birth date.”

Suitably impressed with Peggy’s initiative, Parker was about to assure her that they would do whatever needed to be done to unearth Quinn’s birthday, but before she could say anything, a large, heavy weight of a man bumped into her. “Hey, beautiful!” The thief grimaced as a thick cloud of alcohol smell filled her nostrils.

The intruder oozed towards the bar, jostling both Peggy and Parker as he inserted himself between them. “You are the prettiest thing in this bar.”

If she hadn’t already smelled how drunk he was, Parker would have known he was drunk or stupid by the simple fact of that statement. Just within her field of vision she spotted four pieces of jewelry and a watch that were prettier than anyone or anything else in here. “You need to go,” she said, making no effort to hide her annoyance. “I was talking to my friend.”

“What friend?” the drunk asked, reaching out to fumble for a hand-hold on her. Parker’s hand closed around the nearest implement on the bar – she thought it was probably a fork, but didn’t dare look to confirm – and tried to decide on the least vital part of his large, smelly body to attack.

Before she could strike, however, she heard Peggy say, “This friend!” and saw one of the bowls of peanuts littering the bar top being swung at the back of the man’s head. Howling in pain and clutching at his bruised scalp, he stumbled forward – which gave Parker the opportunity to bring a knee up sharply into his solar plexus. As he doubled over in pain she shoved him away from her, which sent him staggering into another couple talking a foot or two away from the bar. The woman screeched and her companion swung.

“I am so sick of guys like that,” Peggy huffed, setting the bowl back down on the bar. “Quinn would _never_ …”

As the fight began to swell and spread around them, Parker wondered if Eliot’s evening was going as well as hers looked like it was starting to.  
**********************************************  
“You are hell on my reputation,” Quinn commented as he finished off the gluten-free, completely vegan chocolate torte Eliot had insisted on ordering to finish off their meal. “Not to mention my waist-line.”

Eliot snorted. “Please – you dress better than I did when Damien Moreau was buying my wardrobe.” He finished off the last swallow of the vintage port he’d ordered for them to enjoy with the chocolate. “I’m just trying to broaden your horizons.”

Remembering the ostensible reason behind their evening’s outing, Quinn couldn’t suppress a smile. “And threaten my life, apparently. Gotta admit – as deliveries go, this is one of the more elegant I’ve ever experienced.”

If he had been a bit more certain the faint blush of color suddenly staining Eliot’s cheeks was embarrassment and not the result of the wine, Quinn would never have let him hear the end of it. “You’ve been around Parker enough to know how she gets when her mind is set on something. I like you, but I wasn’t going to listen to _that_ for a month before doing what she wanted.”

“You know,” Eliot continued, after they’d paid the check and left the restaurant, “if this thing with you and Peggy is going somewhere, you’ve got some decisions to make.”

Quinn sighed. “I’ve been thinking about that. A lot, really, since we got back from visiting her folks. It’s one thing for her to be okay with the whole hitman thing, but you and I both know it’s not a lifestyle that supports having people around long-term.”

“You could retire.”

When they were both settled in the Charger and Eliot had keyed the engine to life, Quinn said, “I don’t see that lasting. I’ve already cut back, but Peggy’s at the height of her career – busier than she’s ever been. I can be as supportive as the next guy, but me supporting her isn’t the same as somebody like you being able to share her passion for the work.”

They drove in silence for a few miles before Eliot said, “We’ve offered you a place on the team at least four times since Nate and Sophie left. If you’re waiting for me to bring it up again, you’re going to wait a long time.”

Quinn grinned, ducking his head. “So…the offer doesn’t have an expiration date?”

Eliot’s only response to that was a truly epic eye roll.

Peggy’s car was in the back parking lot at Bridgeport when they returned. “I hope everything’s okay,” Quinn said. “I know she said she wanted to have an early night, but…”

They could hear Parker and Peggy as they approached the back door to the building – the women were talking loudly, interspersed with laughter and the sound of glassware clinking.

“Man, there is nothing right about you two,” the hitters heard Hardison say, as they entered the offices of Leverage International. Peggy and Parker were laughing and pouring out what looked like the last of a bottle of Nate’s whiskey. It took Quinn a moment to realize what he was seeing; the two friends were dirty and disheveled – their clothes torn and their shoes missing – and from where he was standing looked like they’d had the time of their lives.

“Quinn!” Before he or Eliot could say anything, Peggy was squealing his name and running towards him. A moment later she was in his arms – her legs wrapped tight around his waist – and she was kissing him fiercely enough to stagger him.

“What the hell, Parker?” he dimly heard Eliot ask. Phrases like ‘bar fight’ and ‘drunk asshole’ and ‘Peggy clobbered him’ filtered through his awareness, but nothing mattered more in this moment than the woman in his arms.

“Have fun?” he asked, when she finally let him up for air? Her eyes were wide and shining, and she was more than a bit drunk as she nodded enthusiastically.

“Take me home, and I’ll show you just how much,” she said.

Apparently tomorrow’s job was suddenly a lot less important than it had been coming into the evening. Eliot’s earlier threat of death by beating was certainly the furthest thing from Quinn’s awareness now, as he carried Peggy to her car.


End file.
